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By Wrapping Paper of St. Paul, Minnesota! Thanks, Tim!

Monday, February 16, 2009

Forbidden Love

Over the weekend, love & romance filled the hearts of many people around the world for Valentine's Day. It was a time to cuddle with a loved one, have a romantic dinner, nibble on some chocolates perhaps... and most of all, to lose yourself within the undying love of your partner.

Except for those of us who are still alone. We got F'd. Again.

One NeighborGooder who has clearly been getting F'd over and over again on Valentine's Day, has finally decided to rid herself of the terrible gifts she's gotten over the years on this hopelessly idiotic holiday:

Although candles can be romantic in the proper context, the "Forbidden Fruit" candle-in-a-jar is really not the route to go when buying fire for your partner. Despite the label urging you to "Light a candle, create your own moments... often," the moments created by the stench of the Forbidden Fruit are often accompanied by dizziness, nausea and vomiting.

Or perhaps those are just side effects of this woman being roofied by her Valentine.

This woman was also presented with some fancy perfume to help spice things up:

The bottle looks cool, but no matter what I did to it, the genie wouldn't come out. Useless.

Also useless:
This pair of pink square earrings with some sort of... something drawn on them is really just the worst gift anyone could get on Valentine's Day; even if they were given in the 1980's when these things were somehow real items.

I really can't tell what the design is supposed to be. Are they birds? Some sort of music notes? Bagpipes? It's impossible to discern, mostly because I took a pretty crappy job of photographing these items. I was in a rush as I heard voices coming towards the Laundry Room, and I certainly don't want to be caught taking pictures of things on the Big Blue Table.

What would the neighbors think? I'm the one judging them, it can't be the other way around. It's unnatural.


3 comments:

Kate said...

Bow, arrows, quiver? Whatever, it's hideous.

Ludovica said...

It looks like a bird to me.. Birds of Paradise perhaps..(would go with the theme)Maybe a Carola's Parotia?

Did the coffee table disappear?

Erik said...

cupid arrows for valentines day..... DUHHHH