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By Wrapping Paper of St. Paul, Minnesota! Thanks, Tim!

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Pink is the New NoOneCares

Judging by today's NeighborGoodies, I'm wondering if Hollywood is finally starting to banish one of its worst creations: The Celebutante. You know--the heiresses who are "famous for being famous." The ones who wear giant stupid sunglasses, drunk drive into things and then basically wander the streets in a drugged-out haze while carrying their tiny suicidal dogs until someone takes their photo so everyone can blog about it with "hilarious" captions.

Among the items you might see these hideous creatures carrying are this bright pink triangular purse...
...and its matching water bottle:
Trust me, ladies: We know where your mouths have been; we've seen the videotapes...

...although chances are the vodka you've filled this bottle with has probably killed 99% of the infections living on your diseased lips.

So perhaps the Celebutantes in the Luxurious Hollywood Hills are fading from favor at long last... or at least overcoming their obsession with Pepto Bismol colored accessories.

For the record, green also seems to be "out," judging by these mismatched shoes no one would be caught dead in:


Please take note, you real life "Mean Girls" (or "Heathers," if you're from the 80's): No one wants your used pink water bottle and no one wants your dirty used green shoes.

Especially since they're nowhere near as awesome as mine:


Fools.

And to those of you still reading celebrity gossip blogs: These horrible people won't go away if you keep giving them attention. Look away! Or I will kick your ass with my awesome shoes!

3 comments:

Ludovica said...

That shot makes you look immensely tall.. and also, your shoes rock. You already know I'm not a fan of Barbie pink so I'm glad the effects of the ex celebutante are on the first step of their way to the landfill

Alicia said...

I love your green shoes! You must have a bit of celebutante in you to be able to pull off wearing them. Is that a real word? Celebutante?

No One said...

Those green kitten heels are atrocious.