By Wrapping Paper of St. Paul, Minnesota! Thanks, Tim!

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

The Light of Your Life

When I walked into the laundry room and saw this lampshade on the NeighborGoodies Table...

. . .I was kind of surprised. It seems to be a decent, semi-sturdy lampshade in relatively good shape. Might this be something that is actually of use to someone in the building for once?

Then I moved it, and discovered the rest of what was left behind:

Yes...this is an entire lamp, sans bulb. And when I say "entire lamp" I mean "busted ass former lamp-like set-up that has ceased all functionality." It comes complete with stripped pole connectors (hot!) , so you can't actually put it together & have it stand up on the floor in order to properly illuminate a room. You'd have to lay the randomly shaped metal items side-by-side on your floor, allowing the electricity to flow to a bulb that, if included, would rest dangerously on your carpet beneath the sturdy lampshade.

The whole thing reminds me of this weird plastic animal toy I had as a kid: You'd press the bottom of a little stand that a lion was perched upon, and the lion would collapse into a pile of plastic lion-limbs. When you released the button, he'd stand up again, totally fine. I used to pretend he was a drunk hobo lion who ran away from the circus. Because that's what kids do.

Much like my lion, this lamp's sturdiness wore out years ago and will never stand upright again, no matter how many times you press the button. But on the upside, someone in this Luxurious Hollywood Hills building is sure to end up with that lampshade hilariously placed upon their drunken head at their next holiday party. And, just like the lamp and the drunken runaway hobo lion, they will likely end up in a pile on the floor by the end of the night.

Ahhh, the circle of life.

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