By Wrapping Paper of St. Paul, Minnesota! Thanks, Tim!

Friday, June 13, 2008

The Incredible Shrinking NeighborGoodies

I've noticed a trend on the NeighborGoodies table this week: For some reason, there has been a record number of small Goodies being left... Perhaps a very tiny person has just moved in!

First up, there's this little teapot. . .

. . .both short and stout!

If your tiny cup of tea is too hot (Careful!) you can use this red rubber ice tray to make skinny (but very long) ice...well, "cubes" isn't the right sticks? That doesn't sound right. . .

Whatever the nomenclature, skinny-but-long icy-matter is perfect for any small parties you may be hosting. And, of course, you'll want to look your best. Luckily, there are these two compact, well. . .Compacts from Mary Kay. . .

. . .complete with instructions! I had initially intended to make fun of how silly it seems that you'd need instructions to open a compact, but then I had to refer to them, because I couldn't figure it out on my own. Bah.

All those tiny NeighborGoodies are all great...but this tiny sweater is, by far, my favorite...

You'll definitely want to click on that picture to see this thing in all its hideous, hi-res glory.

It looks to be a homemade baby sweater depicting Santa Claus riding on his sleigh, which is being led by some sort of ascot-wearing moose/reindeer hybrid. Santa, meanwhile, is happily donning some sort of Russian hat and appears to be delivering some eggs and an American flag to some lucky boy or girl.

It looks to me like the sweater, in its initial incarnation, was maybe too small for the baby--perhaps it took longer than anticipated for Grandma to knit, or perhaps Junior came out much bigger than anyone imagined possible. And so, having run out of blue yarn, the green sections at the bottom and on the collar were hastily stitched on by Granny in an attempt to save the sweater.

No word yet on what the three errant wooden buttons are doing on the sweater's left shoulder.

Did I mention that the reindeer is wearing an ascot?

That thing is nothing short of amazing...and it goes perfect with these baby-sized Chococat Suspenders!

I'm not sure what sort of child this kid will grow up to be. .but I'm pretty sure it's not going to be pretty.

And finally, who wants some mini 3 Musketeers bars. . .

. . .which are still housed in their original Easter Basket? Hi, Easter was two months ago.

The "Don't Take Candy From Strangers" rule is doubly important here on the NeighborGoodies Table because:
A: It's stale.

and B: You certainly wouldn't want to risk eating something left by the woman who knitted that sweater, would you? Because, clearly, she's dangerous.

Of course, if there were Rolos in this basket, I likely would not be complaining. But that's neither here nor there.


Toni said...

that "hi res glory" made my eyes burn.

Kate said...

Of course, I thought of garters when I saw the suspenders, which would be seriously creepy. Then I started thinking about all the other Sanrio characters on slutty lingerie. ((shiver))

I shun candy that's abandoned. What was wrong with it that it's originally owner felt the need to abandon it? This is even more true with chocolate candy.